I FUCKING HATE NECROMORPHS!

Why are there Unitologists on board? No really, why? Does this shit not bother anyone else? The crazy death cult having access to life support systems? How am I the only one seeing a problem here?

>>700954321
Shut the fuck up and worry about something that matters, like the bathroom signs getting replaced.

>>700953353
Did you hear something in the vent?

>>700954608
it was me
ive been farting into the ventilation system for 3 days now
you hear it before you smell it btw

>>700953353
There is a dangerous cult on-board replacing the bathroom signs. We must find them before its too late.

>>700954321
>>700954423
kek

anybody keeping up with that audio drama that started last year? I wonder why EA greenlit it after completely canning the DS2 remake idea

>>700953728
All personal should dispose the corpses via airlock. I repeat do not use the amputeed corpses as hugpillows or for sexual relief no matter how lonely you are.

>>700954321
diversity quotas

>>700954321
Why are you an antiunite?

I work down in the mining bay and that new transfer doctor Nicole is a FUARKING qt 3.14
Thinking about letting my foot get crushed by an asteroid chunk just so she can tend to me, then asking her out to do something planetside. Thoughts?

>shit in the tram
>send it to Engineering

Greetings from Bridge, you fucking nerds. We send 8 requests for you to fix our air conditioner, the fuck are you doing? Still listening to the spooky whispers you told us about? Lmaoing at your life you losers

>>700956240
Go for it. She's got a bf but he's just some engineer pussy so who cares

>>700954321
same reason why so many of the government are damn rock worshipers too...

>>700954321
>Its da Unitologists
Fuck off /pol/shimura tard

>>700953353
Alright someone needs to stop putting stasis on the screens when people are playing games its really irritating the TV gets all buggy and shit and we need to get the engineer down here to fix it STOP IT!!!

>>700956992
I'll stasis your wife taking a piss lmao

>>700954321
So toxic and unprogressive.

Lunch lady in the cafeteria keeps telling me something about "making us whole."
How about you make me my whole order, you weird bitch?

>>700953353
>Fucking Lurker tries to stab me in the face with tentacles the moment I wanted to get some sleep
>Go to the toilet and get leaped on by a Leaper
>Not even a couple of seconds passed after offing the Leaper and suddenly ANOTHER Lurker comes out and tries to stab me in the face
>Just when I thought everything was fine I go down to hydrophonics and suddenly I'm met with an oversized tentacle...
Fuck this ship!
The moment we get back to the Sprawl I'm looking for a new job. FUCK THAT!

>>700953353
my favourite part about the remake was the niggers and faggots they added, really rounded out the story.

Gentlemen, this is Captain Ninten Dosony
Due to recent issues brought up by our legal... I mean our medical department, I am hereby removing all of our emulators.
They are a health risk.
The pay2play stations will be restored to full functionality by our engineering team in a few hours.
Any vandalism of them will be treated as a SERIOUS crime and an act of terrorism.

Hey guys I just picked up a dropship from the colony below, it sounds like they are having a wild party in there but won't answer the radio. Should I open the door or just wait for them to do it?

...is it just me or are the posters all over the station a bit...blacker than before?

Engineering to Janitorial, someone clogged the shitter aga-

>>700960250
I can't believe they're remaking Rancid Moon with a black guy.

>>700960250
god im so tired of seeing z-ball americans everywhere

>>700961867
Kek

>>700953353
>church of unitology has gender neutral bathrooms
Imagine being a unitologist cuck. Lol!

i only joined this crew because i heard this ship was full of miners

>>700956474
That was you?
Why is there blood in it?

>>700953353
dead space 4 never ever

>>700956240
>>700956512
Guys, what the hell happened to her? She looks like she swapped skulls with a man and aged 20 years. She was so hot yesterday.

>>700953353
anons, I'm down in the mining deck. someone come help me

>>700963608
Must've got a head transplant.

AAAAAGGGHHHHHHH THEY'RE BREAKING IN AHHHH NOOOOO THEY GOT MEEE-ACK

>>700953353
FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR MARKER!!! *Plasma cutter sounds*

brehs what guns should I use for DS2
I went plasma cutter/line gun/contact beam/ripper in the first game. I liked the ripper at first but it really is awful because it had no stopping power and i took a tonne of otherwise avoidable damage trying to use it throughout the game, so I can definitely get rid of that to try something else. flame thrower was also garbage

>>700969156
I always just end up using the plasma cutter for almost everything and the pulse rifle for crowd control and long range precision shots. I take the ripper for slot 3 but never really use it and the contact beam for 4 if I want to oneshot something tanky like a brute.

>>700954748
smells like white castle

i wrote my manifesto on the bathroom mirror with my own blood but i ended up not dying. can someone send help please

Medbay here, why the fuck are we getting so many growth orders for replacement penises this past week? Are you retards trying to fuck the ventilation fans or something?

>>700969156
i ran plasma cutter and ripper and something else and i ended up softlocked RIGHT before the marker but that's probably because i'm bad at video games

>>700969156
flamer is a meme in 1 but is S-tier in 2

The marker!

Anyone up for smoke sesh in hydroponics?
I got some good shit growing in a private pod.

hmmmm SAAARS there's a giant ANUS on hydroponics turning people into farting benchods

OH MY FAUCI all bodies in morgue VANISHED ! The security jannies are once again to busy dilating in the bathroom, also some vaxxoid stabbed Captain Trump in the eye !
>audio log ends

I don't care how much you scream, I am NOT leaving my room. No planet cracking = no work. I will be gooning until we get back to port.

>>700954321
Stop being antisemitic

>>700955459
No? Any link? I'm a sucker for any dead space content. I watched the animated cartoons dozens of time. I read the books. And I love the voiced comic above everything else.

THIS IS AEGIS VII COLONY. DO NOT COME. I REPEAT, DO NOT ENTER THE COLONY

>>700971289
>And I love the voiced comic above everything else.
Based

>>700971515
Yeah. Don't know why people are bitching about the "amateurish" voice acting, it has an atmosphere so strong it's better than all the other movies combined.

https://youtu.be/HN5Kwv0Fb6k

Heads up to anyone heading down there, some fruitcakes have locked themselves in cold storage to protest that they aren't allowed to use the womens restrooms
Security says they'll give up once they get cold enough but it might be a while

>>700971729
I like that it looks like 30 Days of Night, which is funny because there was a run of that called Dead Space

>>700972465
Barricade the exit and make sure temperatures stay low. Cut off all radio channels and also turn off the lights.

>Power nodes are missing again
MARKER DAMNIT!!! I SWEAR TO ALTMAN THAT IF I FIND THE AUTISTIC ENGINEER SON OF A WHORE WHO KEEPS JAMMING POWER NODES INTO THEIR TOOLS, YOU WILL BE ON LATRINE REPAIR UNTIL WE RETURN TO EARTH!!! I AM SO FED UP WITH THIS CHILDISH NONSENSE, ALTMAN ABOVE!!!!

>>700971729
How many times was the doctor choked near asphyxiation in this I'm only noticing now how often there's a maniac squeezing his throat he got half the colony trying to strangle him. And then he dies in a second when necros show up. That's unfair.

>>700973032
>be unicuck
>get high ranking position using chucrch connections
>make like 600k a year
>99% of it goes away in tithes to the schitzo cult
>can't afford power nodes
glorious convergence any day now, right? two more weeks ayyy

It's depressing realizing that life is so fucking shit and soul crushing I'd rather be teleported in the ishimura hours before the necro invasion rather than continuing with my current existence

>>700971729
Voice acting is decent but the absolutely fucking SHIT art always pissed me off in this. Also the pacing is weird, the main group encounters the meat moss growing in the vents and talks about that for like 15 minutes before they encounter a necromorph and don't seem nearly as disturbed by it as the goop on the walls.

>>700954321
That's really judgy man

>>700975581
Nah I love the art style. It's emphasizing on emotions rather than having a realistic art style. I'm taking this any day over most american comics with stone looking unexpressive faces. And yeah there's some pacing and story issues but it's simply a promoting comic that most players didn't even bother to watch. For what it is I find the amount of effort that was put into it admirable.

>>700970202
dude weed lmao count me in

>>700970202
No way, the last time I got high on this ship I spent 3 hours staring into space and some planet moon thing made out of flesh started talking to me